The Sucklord even has a parodist, the Schmucklord. (The Schmucklord's mission statement: "My clever plan is to make crap instead of good stuff but pretend like I done it on purpose! Clever.") Instead of getting defensive, the Sucklord reached out, asking the hater to scribble on trading cards that would become limited-edition. "I absorbed him," says the Sucklord. "Free labor."